Disturbingly Random

  • Making vinegar slushies
  • milking cats
  • Pubic Zirconium
  • Thombrosis for Dumbies
  • sensational buttons
  • Salad Dressings R Us
  • Steiner will hire a life caddy
  • Sylvia Plath’s curly wool pie
  • bamboo teeth; sustainable dentistry
  • Bleu Cheese and Watermelon Pop Rocks Salad Dressing
  • fashioning your entire wardrobe out of tree bark
  • alto executioners
  • Mary J. Bludgeon
  • An above-ground pool filled with cranberry sauce
  • vengeance of gandhi
  • tying your wiener in a knot with another wiener
  • Harboring uncertain feelings…and terrorists
  • Satirical Comforting
  • “pickle bumps”
  • Craphole Tunnel Syndrome
  • Standing ovulation
  • Antonescu’s lollipops
  • fierce nuggy breath
  • Gertrude Stein and Those Other Faggots
  • disposable housemaids
  • Urethral Yeast
  • Fictional obituaries
  • Teargas Tuesdays at Hickory Creek Daycare
  • King Henry takes lolcats up a notch
  • rubber baby boner bumpers
  • Lil’ Jon’s MesSkeet Skeet Skeet Barbeque Sauce
  • Bojangles McGurgle Puss
  • Whiskey Rick started it all
  • Danny Devito’s skull just sang Wu Tang and won at beerpong
  • ian’s meatball sandwich brigade
  • pooping 17 times a day and thinking its perfectly natural
  • Tony Little running into your window
  • Kirby Puckett spraying gasoline out of his nose
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